Lyrics
You tease that languor is what got me here
Subversive, underclassic tale
But I’m the proof you’re fit for err
Beyond redemption
You take pity on my face because you fear my fate
But I’d never allow you to ever be my saving grace
It’s not a part for me to play
So keep your charity – everything you clearly worked so hard for
And continue feigning I’m not here
You smug imprudent whore
Impaction on your naive bliss
While misfortune swallows all my pride
A prisoner of this darkened mile
Pushed to the margins – bound with dishonor
Ceaseless quarantine
Too much to offer to me
No attempt to capture the moment could circumvent this state I’m in
Tied to your routine – Pawn
Burying my issue deep in narrow mind
You’re blind to the failing
An agitating presence worth
Driving your – serenity now broken
Of pretending that it’s too late
To let me surface – to venture notice
Content to lie
Selling me your life so stable – supporting me a chore
But we share the same exposure
Notes
Rug (click to show)
Rug (click to hide)
This song was a huge departure from the songs we had written before. At the time, my girlfriend (now my wife) and I had decided to stay in Ames over the summer, and crammed ourselves in a tiny fraternity room with no air conditioning that was being rented out for like $350 for the summer, with both of us trying to eat for $15 a week. Combine the stress of the my living and financial situation with the metal and hardcore that Jim had exposed me to over the previous six months, and you’ve got an explanation for the increased aggression in the songs that came out of that period (Monogamy Denial, Arc of Descent, John Hancock, Those Stupid Blue Hats…).
I brought this song to Jim with the music almost exactly how you hear it on the album. It was my first time experimenting with the stream of consciousness writing, and I had a lot of fun just trying to build each part off of the part preceding it, rather than the verse/chorus format. Despite all that, I still managed to sneak in a chorus, and repeat it, and the other parts that repeat, typically do so with some sort of variation. That sort of element is a staple of jazz, where you have your main melody, and then continue tweaking that melody throughout the song. We certainly weren’t reinventing the wheel by applying that idea to our music, a lot of bands do that, but it was fun to experiment with. I’d never written anything like it before, and that style of writing really opened my eyes as to what was possible with songwriting.
